For the most part, I'm an incredibly positive person. I feel that you choose your attitude: you can find things to be happy about, or complain that the world offers you no joy. I do my best to encourage others to view their lives in a similar manner. Spreading the power of positivity is one of my favorite things to do; you never know who's day you're going to make. Except, every once in a while, I falter. I get into these pits of depression (as I am human, and even the strongest man becomes victim to the force known as gravity).
I get caught up in these thoughts:
- "Gosh Shannon, how stupid are you?"
- "Wow, way to make a complete idiot of yourself, no wonder no one takes you seriously"
- "Did you honestly think you could handle that? You're so dim to even think that you could accomplish that"
Even the best of us gets lost in failure, disappointment, and sadness.
I struggle with college. I want to just give up all the time. Sometimes I wake up in the morning before a long day of classes and say "Fuck this. I'll just be a stripper. That has got to be easier..." and hit the snooze button on my alarm for another ten minutes. Yeah, at first you might laugh at this, but then you realize how pathetic it is.
The problem for most people is this one simple question: How easy is it?
Most are so incredibly unwilling to even try something if they know it's not easy. And a lot of the time, having a positive attitude is not easy. Its difficult, and requires an extreme amount of dedication. Finding light within darkness, happiness out of sadness, or good outcomes out of disappointment is challenging.
So, at the end of a long, emotionally draining day, I vent to my facebook about how I'm feeling.
I'm such an idiot...I hate myself for it.
I had experienced a breach in my wall of positivity. My metaphorical armor was in need of shining, and as I search frantically for my silver shine, I scream exactly how I'm feeling. I mess up so much. Everyone expects perfection from me, but lacks forgiveness when I mess up. I don't want to love myself if I only disappoint others.
Massive amounts of negativity was released in one short facebook status. And as I go about finishing my night time routine, I feel my iPhone buzz to inform me that I have a facebook update. I open the page, click the red box with a number one, and see that my mother has commented on my status...crap. So I look to see what she had to say about my self-doubt status:
You are not!!!!!! God doesnt make junk, you are almost perfect in every way. Just like Mary Poppins!!!!
My first reaction after reading this, was a sudden outburst of tears. She is obnoxiously positive. But you know what, she made me feel so much better. Just one positive thought was all it took. It took seconds for her to find the words that would solve my problems that had been festering for days.
The power of positive thinking is undoubtedly useful. And with practice, becomes as easy as giving up all together. Your one positive thought, when given to someone else, could be the edge they need to end their struggle. Or it could at least give them a strong push in the right direction.
Let's all try to encourage positive thinking. We could change the world. What are your favorite positive quotes? Feel free to share as many as you'd like :)